Tuesday, August 27, 2013

2009 and 2010 Stupid Cancer - Living With Melanoma - Part 1



This all began simply enough. Rommie had been after Bill to get his ear looked at for months, but this time, at Christmas, when he mentioned it, Bill touched his ear, and found a tiny lump.  Next thing we knew, we had been to three doctors, and he’d had a biopsy.  It’s never good when your doctor calls and says, “You need to come in to the office to talk.”  That was one of the longest drives of our lives.  So, February, 2009 was when we found out that our lives were changing.

2-12-2009

Last Look
I have a simple request and I didn't call you because I can't talk without getting emotional.  I am only writing to a few very special friends.  Bill is having surgery next Thursday to remove a melanoma on part of his ear and possibly part of his neck.  Please send your prayers his way.

Love, Billie

You are both in my prayers every night and now you will have honorable mention as well. With those prayers, a positive attitude and lots of love we know everything will go well. Please do not hesitate to call me any time of the day or night.
Love, Joline

We will be praying for Bill.  Let us know if there is anything you need. 
Love, Louise and Earl

Oh my dear friend....I am here for you with prayers and hugs and love.  I am praying this minute.
If Bill or you want to talk, remember that I had melanoma 9 years ago, and I am still kicking....but it is always in my mind.......It is a tough thing to hear and very emotionally draining, however, know that prayers are being said for you both.  I will call you this weekend....
love you both, Christie

I definitely will. Many, many, many people have this, my mother in law included, so please stay positive, he is a great guy with a wonderful attitude towards life and this will see him through this. My thoughts and prayers are with you both, as I know how stressful this is. Please keep us informed and thanks for letting us know. 
Love Leroy and Pat

Dear Billie:

Please call us as soon as you find out how it went, we are stunned and both of us are praying for Bill, and want to know details as soon as you can handle it. 
Love, Ennio and Sherry  

Oh, Billie, of course you and Bill will be in our prayers!  Actually, you have been in my prayers each morning anyway that your job searches would be successful!  Please keep us posted on Bill's surgery and if there is anything we can do to help.  We miss you guys!!
Love, hugs and prayers,  Donna & Rollie

Sorry to hear this.  I want you to know that you CAN call and it is absolutely OK to be emotional.  Might be just what you need to let go and not be strong as I'm sure you're doing for Bill and everyone else.  Of course we will say prayers for him.  Please feel free to call if you need or want to. 
XOXO,  Gee

Hi Billie and Bill,

Thanks for letting us know and we will definitely be including Bill in our prayers.  I hope that this is not very serious for him and that you will keep us posted.

Sorry I do not check my messages every day and am responding late.

We love you guys!  Let us know if you need anything.
Susie
Missing A Little Chunk

Before
Fast forward one year.  Just one year after the surgery, Bill found a lump behind his ear, and everything began all over again.  This time, they couldn’t save his ear.  He was now in stage three which has a 30 to 70% survival rate.









3-16-2010

Hi Susie,

After
Things are definitely looking up.  Sunday afternoon, I stopped all the drugs except for regular Tylenol.  Yesterday, the doctor said that was the right thing to do, because he had such a bad reaction - probably due to the combination of Xanax, Lunestra, and Percocet.  He prescribed Tramadol for the pain, and we're alternating between that and Tylenol every four hours. After we got home from the doctor, Bill rested, finally ate something and was able to focus on a little TV.  It was wonderful to have him back, 'cause it wasn't Bill that was occupying his body from Saturday at noon to Sunday night. Today, he is joking and acting completely normal.  The only complaint he had about last night is that his brain is on overdrive, and when he falls asleep, he has weird dreams.  

They took 34 lymph nodes, all of which were negative (insert BIG CHEER here.)  He had 58 staples but she took a few of them out.  She removed the packing on his un-ear, and it really doesn't look too bad.  There is an ear shaped depression, where his new snap-on ear will fit nicely.  The only cancer was on the back of his ear so it's good the ear went bye bye.  They said they got it all (didn't they say that last time?)  I saw all the path reports - PET scan, CAT scan, MRI and biopsies.  I believe they really did.  We're going to San Francisco to a melanoma clinic tomorrow for two consultations to find out what they recommend.  His doctors here all agree that chemo would be an unnecessary trauma for him, because there is no cancer in there to kill.   

I'm doing great now, just a little tired, because it's kind of like having a new baby in the house - every time he moves or breathes differently in bed, I wake up.  I can take a little tiredness.  We're looking forward to tomorrow.  After the clinic, we'll drive back to Sacramento and stay overnight with friends, with whom we always have a lot of fun.  It will be a good break from what we've been going though.

Thank you so much for caring. He is ready for visitors whenever you want to come over. I have a couple of pictures I can send you.

Love to you both,
Billie

3-17-2010

Gee
In a message dated 3/17/2010 6:06:01 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time, mauiboss@aol.com writes:
Ready for my rant?
Not Having a Great Day
We had a looonnggg night last night.  He feels yucky but isn't in pain.  He thinks I'm trying to poison him, planning to leave him and he hasn't let me out of his sight except when I said I was going to the bathroom.  I finally persuaded him to take a sleeping pill about two hours ago and go to bed.  He has called me on the intercom on the phone five times, three of them to find out what I'm doing, so neither of us is really getting any rest. But, at least I can make a sound without him jumping and asking what that was.  Can't wait until we go to the doctor tomorrow to see if he can get some other meds.  I can't imagine why people use drugs like Percocet and Vicodin recreationally if this is what they do to them.

On a lighter note, he isn't eating either, and I'm not hungry, so maybe we'll be svelte by Wednesday.

Love,
Billie


 4-6-10
Fitting For an Ear Cover

We went to see Travis Humphries, a friend of Kathy's and the son of our eye doctor.  He does prosthetics, and he wanted to see if he could fit Bill with something that would cover the ear area.   He did make something, but it didn't work out.  He didn't charge us anything, so we figured it was worth a try.


4-15-2010

Zokay!

Actually, it was a partly good and partly bad day.  When he felt good, he was totally himself.  He came up with a new joke.  He said I was nibbling on his ear, and he warned me not to get carried away like I did with the other one.

Bill has had a major headache that comes and goes, so we were up at 1:00 this morning.  He's already gone to bed with his new narcotic, and I hope it does something for him.  When the headache is there, he is mopey and disagreeable. 

It's Not So Bad
Tomorrow is the last day of the first week of his chemo.  Yay!!

We are looking forward to the weekend. 

How is Maui?  Duh, wasn't that a dumb question?  Maui is wonderful.  Wish we were there.  Write when you can and tell me who's there and what's happening around fantasy resort.  I want to know how the pu'u pu'u party goes and who goes to it.

Love you,
Billie

4-20-2010

Bill is having a dreadful time - headache since last Tuesday, so weak that he has trouble walking from the house to the car, disoriented, chills, nausea, depression, insomnia, no appetite, terrible dreams.  Chemo really sucks.  He said, on Saturday, that he feels like he is in a deep pit, and can't climb out.  He sees no end to this. It's worse than having a baby.  At least when you put one of those down for the night, they sleep for more than 20 minutes at a time, and they don't get up, stumble out to where you are, and scare you half to death, just because they had a dream about flying remote controls.

We were hoping that he'd have only a couple of the possible side effects.  Instead he seems to have all of them.

Okay, that is my rant for the week.

I know you'll have so much fun, so have fun for us, too.

Love,
Billie

June, 2010

He Gets So Exhausted
Bill was asked to take part in a Melanoma Study.  They said it will help other people who need encouragement.  He's doing it, but I wish someone would give him some encouragement.






June 30, 2010
Cruising Along
Just Being Silly

We had a wonderful time on the cruise to Mexico with Bryanna and Bailey, and the drive to Las Vegas to stay with Rollie and Donna. We hope to take them on another cruise after when Bill is done with the treatments.

Bill was dragging the whole time, but he did such a great job of hiding it.  He had fun but would have had more fun if he hadn't had to have his shots which wipe him out.  

I did all the driving, but that gave him more opportunity to be silly with the girls on the trip.









7-27-2010
Did Bill tell you about the problem with getting his new ear?  His surgeon arranged for him to go to an oral surgeon to do the attachment, but our insurance won't cover it because they say it is a dental procedure.  They don't seem to understand that his ear is not in his mouth.  Everything is on hold until we can get some answers.
This is a late start day, so I had just a little time to write to you.  Sorry I have to go now, to get ready to go to work. 

Love to all,
Billie

9-18-2010

Subject: Wow-didn't know anything was wrong
Just finally checked e-mails and face book and saw the video on Bill.  When did this happen?  I can't believe you guys have to deal with another situation....I hope that you find answers soon and that his condition gets back to normal right away.

Hope you had a fun time with Tony when he was here.  Did you go see the bats?

Talk to you soon and sending my best wishes,
Susie

Susie,
We enjoyed Tony and Anais' visit so much.  We did take them to see the bats.  Kathy and Rommie took them to Sand Harbor for some old fashioned crawdad hunting and playing on the rocks.  Bill didn't feel up to even a partial day on the beach, so we didn't go.  During their visit, he started to go downhill, as far as how he felt physically as well as his attitude, so the four of us visited his oncologist (we sure do know how to show people a good time!)  He couldn't even sit in the office, had to lie on the table.  She gave him a week of vacation from chemo, from Tuesday, Sept 7th to Wednesday, Sept 15.  She also gave him a steroid to perk him up.  He took it and within one hour, he felt almost normal.  That's the night we went to Mi Casa, so it was really fun.  He even had two sips of Anais' margarita (with doctor permission!!)  

He had such a good week, feeling better every day.  He had a brain scan on the 9th, just to rule out brain involvement. We saw the doctor on the 13th, and he said the scan was perfect.  He told us to start the chemo again, but to go back to half-doses for two weeks.  On Tuesday, he started to have trouble with his tongue feeling thick.  It would come on and then go away a few minutes later.  We thought it might be side effects from the steroid.  He had his first shot on Wednesday night. Thursday, he had paralysis on the right side of his face, so we spent the day at various doctors, and then went to St. Marys for another brain scan, because they thought it could be a stroke.  He is having trouble swallowing, and talking.  Brain scan was normal. Yesterday, we went to two doctors.  They now think it is Bell's Palsy, which can come on for no reason, and can go away spontaneously.  He is on a different steroid, and eating a special diet of foods that are easy to swallow.  That's the physical part.  The mental part is that he is quick to fall apart, and he gets upset with me when  I try to anticipate what he is saying so he won't have to finish his sentences, since it is so hard for him to talk. I'm trying not to do that.  I wish we could just have someone throw some fairy dust on us, that would let us sleep for the next seven months.  

Stop and Smell the Roses



Sorry I didn't call you.  I got chastised by Tony because he found out the same way you did.  Bill's idea in posting the video was to let people who are following our adventures, know that he is having a problem, but that he is okay.  I'm just so tired, and I'm trying to do all the jobs on top of all of this.  When I'm not dealing with him, I am either sleeping or watching TV.  I'll let you know if we find anything else out.

Love,
Billie  

Thank you for the update.  I am so sorry that you both are having to deal with this now and that you are so tired...and Bill can't talk well.  You are in our thoughts and prayers daily.  Please keep us posted.  We will be leaving for our California vacation on 10-2 and back in town on the 12th.  We will both have our cell phones with us and can even text now so feel free to call or e-mail.

We are going out tonight for Danielle's birthday and babysat last night for them.  Work has been really busy this week and I am beat too but other than that all is well over here.

Take care the best you can and keep the faith.   This too shall pass.

Love,
Susie

9-24-2010

Bill has been in the hospital since Monday, with breathing difficulty, which they've attributed partly to anxiety.  He has BelI's Palsy, which has partially paralyzed the right side of his face, making it hard to swallow, so he is drinking thick liquids and eating pudding consistency foods, which are easier to swallow.  They've been doing extensive testing and have found melanoma on his liver, and probably on his kidney.  We don't have a prognosis, yet.  Of course, we are hoping for surgery, chemo and radiation to take it all away, but we just don't know.  We'll see the oncologist, tomorrow, I hope, and find out as much as we can to pass along.  Sorry I didn't call, but you wouldn't be able to understand what I'm saying, so I chose this way to tell you. I'm numb. We love you and know that you are sending up constant prayers for us.




9-29-2010

Aloha Bill and Billie:

Jarret has Bell's Palsy too which affects his whole side at times as well as his face. He attributed it to a herpes cold sore virus. Thank goodness it goes away!

We will keep Bill in our prayers, and in fact will have our church pray for him. This has been a week of bad news it seems, with a friend from Oregon  losing her daughter to lupus. And Stan Cobb (an ex-owner who lived in Building Ten) being diagnosed with prostate cancer. Thanks for keeping us updated, and when you see Bill give him a huge aloha hug from us.


Aloha
Paul and Kath

Gee,

I just read your email to Bill, and we both appreciate your words very much. We are so fortunate to have you two in our lives.  We had a visit from the oncologist a few minutes ago, and we got encouraging news.  The kidney has
a cyst, and only a cyst. He believes the melanoma on his kidney is operable and can be totally removed.  We won't know any more for a few days, and he is going to have more tests done, especially for the palsy, so I will let you know more when we know more.

I can breathe again.
Billie

Subject: Re: Bill
Oh Billie, we are so sorry to hear this news.  We love you guys and are so sorry you are going thru this.  We fully understand if you can't call.  Let us know what the oncologist says.  We're sending positive thoughts your way. 

Joe and Gee


9-30-2010

Dear Joe and Gee,

Bill is feeling much better, although his swallow is still not all there.  We saw his oncologist this afternoon, and he does not have any evidence of cancer in his thyroid.  So, we just have to see the surgeon and set a date for the surgery to remove part of his liver.  Best news we've had in a while.  We love knowing that you are there for us.
              
Love,
Bill and Billie

10-6-2010

I'm sending this as a mass email, so there are no personal notes here.  We have all kinds of things to do today, but I want to keep you informed.  We went to see Dr. Galanopolous, who is a surgical oncologist, yesterday. We liked him right away, even before he told us that he believes he will be able to get all the cancer.  Of course, he won't know for sure until he actually sees inside the liver.  There will be a few tests over the next couple of weeks, so the surgery will be scheduled for the end of this month or the beginning of next month.  Bill will be in the hospital for 3 to 5 days and his recovery time will be about 6 weeks.  He's going to have a big ole scar so you won't be seeing him on the beach in a bikini ever again.  Oh well, that's a picture you probably would rather not see, anyway. 

We love to hear from everyone, but we know you have busy lives, so don't worry about answering this.  We are happy knowing that prayers are being said for him.

Love,
B & B


11-6-2010



Aloha,

Saw Pat & Leroy this AM on way to beach. Told them we would bring over sheets and comforter at same time. They were OK with that.

Sorry to hear that Bill isn't doing well with the meds. I can fully understand your dilemma regarding Bill. Now, I'm gonna play mom and quote my mom: If you don't take care of yourself and then you get sick then you'll have two problems -his AND yours and then who's gonna take care of him? Keep rested, eat well, drink lots of water, (and a bourbon here and there), relax when you can. Don't feel guilty about leaving and take advantage of this time when you don't have to be there all the time because he has hospital staff to take care of him. AND let Kathy and others help! Don't try to do it all - reach out.

I'm glad that Tony was able to be there for the operation, but wish he could've stayed longer to help you out. Keep us informed.

XOXO

Gee

Dear Gee,
Hi, my phone ringer has been off so it wouldn't bother Bill, and I just found out that the vibrate feature wasn't on, so I missed a lot of calls.  I thought nobody liked me enough to call!  Anyway, I just listened to Joe's voice mail.  If you don't mind, why don't you wait until the comforter arrives to deliver the things to Pat.  Only one trip over there is easier.  I really don't care, though.  Do whatever you want to do.

Getting Out and About

Running a Marathon
Bill is being difficult.  He hates the pain meds 'cause they make him have weird dreams, but he needs more than OTC stuff.  After Tony left this morning, I spent the rest of the day at the hospital, and he was constantly up and down, wanting to get outa there, etc.  I worked with the nurse to get his medicine changed back from Dilaudid to morphine, which didn't give him hallucinations.  Finally, I couldn't stand it anymore, and I told him I thought he would get a better rest without me there.  He cried and said he was sorry to be such a bother.  How do you let someone you love know that, yes, you are being a bother.  I don't know whether to be a mom and tell him that he should just suck it up and concentrate on doing his exercises and trying to sleep?  Or to just hold him and let him get it out.  I pray that I'll go in tomorrow and find that the morphine with Benydryl helped him to get some sleep.

I'm home now and I'm going to fix some dinner and try to find a good old movie to watch.

Love,
Me

Stage  IV-  7 to 10% chance of five-year survival
Stage IV melanomas are very hard to cure, as they have already spread to distant lymph nodes or other areas of the body. Skin tumors or lymph node metastases causing symptoms can often be removed by surgery. Metastases in internal organs are sometimes removed, depending on how many are present, where they are located, and how likely they are to cause symptoms. Metastases that cause symptoms but cannot be removed surgically may be treated with radiation, immunotherapy, or chemotherapy.

Ipilimumab (Yervoy), a newer immunotherapy drug, has been shown to help some people with advanced melanoma live longer. It is just now coming into use, but some doctors may prefer it over other treatment options, such as chemotherapy or other types of immunotherapy.

The chemotherapy drugs in use at this time are of limited value in most people with stage IV melanoma. Dacarbazine (DTIC) and temozolomide (Temodar) are the ones most often used, either by themselves or combined with other drugs. Even when chemotherapy can shrink these cancers, the effect is often only temporary, with an average time of about 3 to 6 months before the cancer starts growing again. In rare cases they are effective for longer periods of time, however.

Immunotherapy using interferon or interleukin-2 can help a small number of patients with stage IV melanoma live longer. Higher doses of these drugs seem to be more effective, but they also have more severe side effects.

Some doctors recommend biochemotherapy: a combination of chemotherapy and either interleukin-2, interferon, or both. For example, some doctors use interferon with temozolomide. The 2 drugs combined cause more tumor shrinkage, which may make patients feel better, although the combination has not been shown to help patients live longer. Another drug combination uses low doses of interferon, interleukin-2, and temozolomide. Each seems to benefit some patients. Patients should carefully consider the possible benefits and side effects of any recommended treatment before starting.

Because stage IV melanoma is very hard to treat with current therapies, patients may want to think about taking part in a clinical trial. Clinical trials of new chemotherapy drugs, targeted drugs, new methods of immunotherapy such as vaccines, and combinations of different types of treatments may benefit some patients.

Even though the outlook for patients with stage IV melanoma tends to be poor overall, a small number of patients have responded very well to treatment or have survived for many years after diagnosis.

11-8-2010
Dear Monique and Brian,
  
Okay, things are back to "normal."  Bill had ups and downs while in the hospital.  He had an epidural for the surgery, which they left in after it.  That did a great job of controlling the pain, but his right leg was still numb 18 hours after surgery.  He couldn't move it, which meant that he couldn't get out of bed.  They changed that to morphine, which worked, except, he wouldn't push the button, so he was in pain. They changed it to something else, which made him have hallucinations whenever he closed his eyes, so he couldn't sleep.  They put him back on morphine, but made it automatic, so he wasn't in control of the dose.  Saturday night, he was finally able to get a good sleep on morphine and Benadryl.

I spent the first night with him, on a cot that I think they picked up at the thrift store after someone had used it for 47 years.  It was so lumpy that I got ten blankets to put on it, and I still had bruises in the morning from the springs.  Anyway, Tony and Bill made me come home after that so I could get some sleep. Did you know that hospitals are not quiet places?  There are dings, clunks and constant talking from nurses and visitors.  They don't even ask people to keep the noise down. Bill heard one patient come out of his room and ask the nurses if there was a block party going on, because it was so noisy. 

Keeping Busy
He was so glad to be able to come home yesterday.  He can't get really comfortable, so he walks around the house, sampling all the chairs, but at least he is here walking around.  I thought you'd like to see a picture of him from Saturday. 

Love,
Me

11-20-2010

Dear Craig and Jackie,

Bill continues to improve, feeling good for a couple of days, then feeling just okay.  It's two weeks and three days post-surgery.  His surgical oncologist said he is very pleased with his progress, and he pronounced him cancer free.  Let's hope he stays that way.  There will probably be some chemo coming up, but for now, he can concentrate on getting better.  The only thing the doctor failed to do was tell us that he would have to modify his diet.  Luckily a couple of friends did let us know, 'cause my brain was not engaged, so I didn't even think that he might not be able to eat normally.  I believe you were one of the ones who gave us some advice on that.  I wish we had heeded you.  Last Tuesday, he felt so well, that he had a burrito for lunch and a small piece of pizza for dinner followed by a doughnut for dessert.  Duh!!  He had a terrible night, and we learned our lesson.  We should both benefit from a different way of eating.  We've tossed or given away most of the things he can't eat.  Unfortunately, that means no Christmas baking will be done at our house.  Happy Thanksgiving to you, and we do hope to see you during the holidays if you happen to be down this way.  It doesn't look as if we will be able to drop in on you, at least for a couple of months, as my work schedule during the holidays is crazy.

 Monday, December 28, 2009, 5:57 PM

Letter to Scott

We had quite the adrenalin rush this morning.  We were on the way to Westwood, Calif, about
20 miles west of Susanville, just driving along at about 30, going down an icy hill, minding our own business, when
suddenly a pick-up truck came up the hill from the other direction.  It skidded toward us and then corrected,
but he lost control completely and went over the side. If he hadn't corrected, he would have slammed right into
us.  It took me a long time to come to a stop (great ABS by the way), (and Dad was already on the phone to 911),
but when I did, I backed up to across from where he was and got out of the car, only to slide on the ice.  I
quickly pulled on my boots, and started across when I saw the man climbing up the embankment.  From the condition of his truck, it is amazing that he survived, let alone got himself out.  We made him get in our car and gave him tissues and baby wipes to help with the bleeding of his
head.  While we waited, I called his wife to let her know what had happened.  After a few minutes, he wanted to go over to see his truck, so I U-turned to park next to it, and he got out.  It was pretty amazing the way he landed between a group of trees.  If he had hit one of them, he probably would have been much worse.  He was worried about his computer and his master's thesis, so he went down to see if he could get them.  When he turned the computer on, it worked fine, so he was pretty happy about that, but not too pleased about his destroyed truck.  The police and ambulance arrived and we gave our statement, then went on our way to our job. 

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